Source [[Book - No bad Parts]] - learn to appreciate, reframe, and see the obvious "destructive" feelings/ impulses/emotions/thoughts patterns as more than that -- they are manifestation of a Part playing an protective role (but at an extreme) - "What is the function of the symptoms, behavior?" - [[Function of illness]]" - Just like family therapy, we can release the person from a fixed "role", they don't have to be stuck / fixed into a protector role. Healing happens when we can connect with the exiles, withness what happened to them, and know how bad it was; then invite them to be unstuck from the past to come with me in the present, then they can unburden the belief and emotions they have been carrying. Self-leadership - Embodiment - Asking the parts, after you have acknowledge them (sort of like mindfulness), to let you lead. - Quality that shows that you are leading from the Self. - Sense of Curiosity, Calmness, Confident, Compassion, Creativty, Clarity, Courage, Compassion. - The author observed that there is a Self in everyone, and it has all these qualities if they can be separated from the Parts. But often the Self have been blended with Parts. - there is no need to develop or learn that quality; the author said that the Self already possesses that quality. He said that in the patients he worked with, when they were able to embodied Self, (differentiation, my word, from Parts.) they naturally know how to heal and care for themselves. - The state of "Pure self" is hard to sustain, in reality we are blended to different parts. - Figure out personal signs/markers that can tell you that you have departed from the sense of self, as you go about your day. (This reminded me of mindulness) - When people are not bound up by protectors, they naturally know how to work with the parts in loving ways. Waves or Particle - When we are troubled/blended, we lose the perspective that we are "wave", connected with life, we feel disconnected from other people, and life, like particles